ALT-SEX

(an Internet column by Luce Irrigation)

Hi and welcome to my introductory column on what I'm calling *Alt- Sex*. This column will appear exclusively on Intell's Clubstitute Network and, I hope, will stir up all kinds of discussion on what's happening to our global culture in *sexual* terms. Since this is MY column, these terms will be my own which is another way of saying that many times I'll go out of my way to define *sexuality* on MY OWN terms. These terms and their definitions are subject to change at any given nanosecond, which is what the *sexual* impulse is all about, that is, changing subjects and/or subjectivities interpenetrating the collective-flux of all the virtual realities that layer our global culture.

My intention in creating this column will be to be at once funny, theoretical, practical, therapeutic, fictional and eschatological, in essence *developing a free bodyware program* whose potential is not necessarily founded on the principles of exploiting the cyberspace marketplace but in generating heated interest in the way we use these virtual realities that permeate our consciousness to *reinvent* our sexuality.

I will often resort to *fictionalized representations* of *figurative objects* to further delineate my observations. In this, my first column, I will introduce to you my best friend, Rrose Selavy (she calls herself this because she is a great admirer of the 20th century artist Marcel Duchamp who invented the name "Rrose Selavy" based off a pun in French, i.e. *eros say-la-vee*, in effect saying, "eros, that's life"). Rrose, prototypical art-theory slut that she is, says that Duchamp was obsessed with womanhood and that she too, being bisexual, is obsessed with womanhood and is interested in exploring the feminization of Being, whether that Being be located in a body with female or male genitals attached to it.

"But Being, that ultimate sewer of life, is really just a fabrication, right?", she continues, "I mean, come on, what is all this talk about what I want to *be* or she's just *being* a bitch or he's *being* a complete asshole. Do people really want *to be*? I'd say no, not really. They want to blow Being away. And what better way to blow Being away, especially when you're alive, than by experiencing the ultimate in sexual sensation---the orgasm. I live for my orgasms."

And Rrose will take those orgasms any way she can get them. She's constantly telling me her stories about anonymous sexual encounters or continued sexual encounters with a virtual bevy of men and women who she sees in terms of their *sexual quotient*.

"Right, sexual quotient," she explains, "this is the result of the total mass of human flesh divided by the amount of time I have to play with it all!" Her wonderful, full laugh, displayed as a sound-effect coming out of her world-class smile and rrose-red lips, makes my own heart tingle with the wit of her aural embrace. Rrose was the first person I ever knew to show me the way toward a *hyper-eroticized feminization of my psyche* which could be experienced on many different levels, not just physical.

I keep thinking that if we need to get in touch with our bodily desires, then we need to actively pursue these desires as if they were our own, not created by some In-Tell advertisement that says in order to be loved we have to buy a particular product or teleport to a particular interzone like Prague-23. We must move beyond the border of somebody else's perfectly-marketed virtual reality and create our own.

Crack the code to digital being.

I'm starting to sound like Rrose again.

[to subscribe to Alt-Sex, send 50 megadots of zirconium energy to me, Luce Irrigation, at appliance@slave.com]